RECALL NOTICE
The Maker of all human
beings is recalling all
units manufactured,
regardless of make or year,
due to a serious defect in
the primary and
central component of the
heart.
This is due to a malfunction
in the original prototype
units code named Adam and
Eve, resulting in the
reproduction of the same
defect in all subsequent
units. This defect has been
technically termed
"Sub-sequential Internal
Non-Morality," or more
commonly known as SIN, as it
is primarily expressed.
Some other symptoms include:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent
behavior
6. Depression or
confusion in the mental
component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
The Manufacturer, who is
neither liable nor at fault
for this defect, is
providing factory-authorized
repair and service free of
charge to correct this SIN
defect. The Repair
Technician, Jesus, has most
generously offered to bear
the entire burden of the
staggering cost of these
repairs. There is no
additional fee required.
The number to call for
repair in all areas is
P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once
connected, please upload
your burden of SIN through
the REPENTANCE
procedure. Next, down-load
ATONEMENT from the Repair
Technician, Jesus, into the
heart component. No matter
how big or small the SIN
defect is, Jesus will
replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control
Please see the operating
manual, the B.I.B.L.E.
(Basic Instructions Before
Leaving Earth), for further
details on the use of these
fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to
operate the human being unit
without correction voids any
manufacturer warranties,
exposing the unit to dangers
and problems too numerous to
list and will result in the
human unit being permanently
impounded.
DANGER: The human being
units not responding to this
recall action will need to
be scrapped in the furnace.
The SIN defect will not be
permitted to enter Heaven
so as to prevent
contamination of that
facility.
Thank you for your
attention!
Signed,
GOD
Please assist where
possible by notifying others
of this important recall
notice, and you may contact
the Father any time by
"knee-mail".
